Everyone is going to experience grief and loss if they are human. Even dogs and other mammals have been found to grieve the loss of a loved family member or young one they birthed. The difference is the range of emotions humans experience with loss. There are many types of loss and grief from losing a job to divorce, separation, moving, and the biggest one: death. No two people will ever experience loss the same. Healing is a lifelong journey of learning how to cope with the rhythms of loss and look at grief as a process and a journey, rather than a destination at which to arrive when you are ‘done grieving.’
Support System
In times of great sorrow, pain, and loss, loved ones carry us through. Feeling alone, unable to move forward, and stuck are all valid things when it comes to grief and loss. Isolation is common because it is hard to go out and do things when grief is right there all the time. Quite often, loved ones who are not the closest to the loss don’t know what to say but loved ones inside the loss with everyone else can say hurtful things that are not helpful. Since every person grieves their own way, there is no ‘right way’ to do it. Support groups provide valuable space and opportunity to connect in the community with others who can understand and share the pain of loss openly without fear of judgment.
Staying Healthy
The last thing many people think about when they suffer a loss is their health. Quite often, it is the one thing people are most surprised goes downhill during a season of deep grief and loss is their health, whether it be weight loss (or gain) and other symptoms. Being healthy requires intentionality. Some things to keep in mind:
- Eat vegetables and watch sugar or carbs that deprive the body of nutrients and energy when it is already low
- Get enough sleep when the body is tired
- Try to go for walks rather than push the body into intense exercise before you are ready
- Stay connected with others struggling with loss, whether in the family or outside of it (depending on the loss)
- Let emotions be what they are but find a safe way to express them
- Find meditation practices or journaling that help with the healing process
- Don’t be afraid to seek counseling or even medication for lingering issues that won’t resolve
Professional Support
Not everyone believes professional support is the best route for grief. The truth is, grief takes on many forms and has many layers. When it is not dealt with, the layers pile up over time until it feels overwhelming. Early tragedy or loss compounded with trauma can cause mental health issues to the surface, which require professional attention. Clinical depression is different from grief and depressive symptoms. A person is likely to find with clinical depression:
- Feelings of hopelessness that won’t go away
- Feeling like life will never be normal
- Feeling more isolated
- Feeling a heavy feeling most days rather than waves where there are good and bad days
- Strategies to cope are not working
Complicated grief is another challenge for people who may not know what to call what is happening in their mind and body. Grief goes on for an unfixed duration, but regular grief takes the person grieving on a journey of healing. Experiences with grief may find someone fixated on the loss, unable to move on, and are struggling to move past a loss even years later. There is hope and help for grief and loss recovery. Mental health professionals and counselors trained in grief recovery can often be the best pathway to healing as they can help identify the layers and see what steps may need to happen to move forward so the griever can find hope and joy again in life.
Diehl-Whittaker Funeral Service brings healing to families at a time of deep sorrow. Our goal is to bring families and loved ones together to celebrate the life of a beloved relative or friend. There is no one way to grieve. Let us help you honor your loved one. If you need help with services, please call us: (614) 258-9549
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